Photo by Vince Fedoroff
THE GRIM REALITIES OF PTSD – Shown left to right at last Thursday’s talk are Devin Bailey, a Whitehorse paramedic; Ian Angus, a former marine and firefighter; and Dawson City fire chief Jim Regimbal. On the screen is Jeff Dill of the Firefighter Behavioural Health Alliance.
If you can’t handle this, you’re in the wrong line of work.
If you can’t handle this, you’re in the wrong line of work.
That’s what one of Devin Bailey’s colleagues told Bailey when the pair were first responders to a particularly nasty traffic accident in 2011.
Last Thursday, Bailey, a Whitehorse paramedic, said the fact that he was speaking to a room full of people about his experiences was a sign things are moving in the right direction today.
Last week, the Yukon Employees Union hosted a multi-day Human Rights Speaker Series. Thursday’s talk was about post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Dawson City fire chief Jim Regimbal moderated the discussion, which focused on the many faces of trauma – how best to support workers dealing with trauma, and what are its effects?
For Bailey, the effects included anger and trouble sleeping.
He was afraid of freezing up while out on a call.
He was working a lot because, he told a room of roughly 30, it was hard to take a sick day, or say no to overtime. Doing so meant putting extra work on someone else.
“You think that the system starts to revolve around you and you start feeling this massive amount of guilt when you’re not there,” said Bailey.
“It got to the point where I felt more comfortable around the chaos and the trauma than I felt around my family. I have three young children.”
Bailey only recognized what was going on with himself when he enrolled in a course for first responders. He found he identified with many of the symptoms of PTSD (he has never been formally diagnosed).
From there, he took a month off to reflect.
He made a conscious decision to take sick days when he needed them. To say no to overtime. To figure out a way to talk to his wife about his day – something he’d avoided in the past because he worried about boring her or traumatizing her.
As he spoke, people around the room nodded along. One of those was Bailey’s fellow panelist, Ian Angus.
A former marine and firefighter, Angus told the room he hung up his badge over a double infant fatality.
He said it led to the end of his marriage. It kicked off addictions.
“My story’s not always a pretty one,” he said, noting that life “went sideways” for him one day when he was sitting on his porch, drinking from the same glass his grandfather used to drink out of after returning home from the war.
Angus’s son walked up and asked him to play ball. Angus said yes, but as soon as he stood up, he realized he couldn’t even play ball with his kid.
Life has been difficult, Angus said.
He’s survived four suicide attempts.
He personally knows 18 marines who have died since they served together.
He knows six firefighters who have retired under rough circumstances.
Angus said he knows it can be hard to discuss the toll of on-the-job experiences such as his, particularly with people who haven’t been through it, but we need to teach people that it’s OK to talk, he said.
“It’s going to be a lifelong journey for me. I got through because people stopped and helped me, and now it’s my turn to stop and help,” he said.
Some of the venues for that help include programming through the American-based organization Firefighter Behavioural Health Alliance (FBHA).
Founder and former firefighter Jeff Dill Skyped into the noon-hour panel to talk about what the FBHA offers.
In addition to workshops on retiring from fire and EMS (something that’s accompanied by feelings of identity loss and a lack of belonging), the FBHA offers workshops for family members of emergency personnel, and suicide prevention and awareness.
“When we lose someone in a vehicle accident or a disease, tragic as it is, we understand it,” said Dill.
“But for those who lost someone to suicide, especially in fire and EMS, it haunts them. It haunts them for a very, very long time.
“And so we need to make sure that they’re taken care of, networking with other families so that they have someone who can really relate to their issues.”
Relating is important, all three speakers agreed. Opening up and talking about it. Acknowledging how difficult the job can be, and in what ways.
Bailey said it’s an honour to help people in times of need, but it takes a toll. People have to move beyond seeing first responders as heroes, he said.
“When people come in (to the service now), they’re not told, ‘if you can’t handle this, you’re in the wrong line of work.’ You’re being told, and I’m telling people, that if you can’t handle that, it’s because you’re human,” said Bailey.
“We’re not designed to go be at some of the most intimate moments of people’s lives, traumatic moments, painful moments, and not feel anything.”
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Comments (20)
Up 16 Down 2
westofbelfast on Dec 15, 2016 at 1:22 pm
June: Way back in World War 1 they used to call it "shell shocked" or just plain "cowardice". Since then, it has been called "battle fatigue". PTSD might be a relatively new handle for this but the condition itself is hardly a "flavour of the month". As a comparison, nobody used the term FASD twenty years ago. Again I'll say that one cannot fathom the impact of these situations until you are actually exposed or for that matter what particular incident or set of circumstances will hit you most hard. I'll wager if you went to a college anywhere that teaches paramedics that there is not a single student in those courses who is not aware of PTSD. What they are likely not aware of, but would admit to quickly, is how they will be impacted once out in the field.
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Just Say'in on Dec 15, 2016 at 4:44 am
Not everyone gets into these vocations for the correct reasons anymore. There was a time when a Doctor, Nurse, Teacher, Fireman etc. entered the profession because it was a "Calling", now it is a good paying Government Job with a good pension.
Recently I found out that it was policy that an Ambulance must stop and not proceed past the end of a paved road. The attendants cannot go farther then within sight of the Ambulance. They won't ride on a Snowmobile or ATV either unless it is operated by a Fireman. "Really". So then it is up to some layman to drag the victim within reach. The excuse given is that they can't be expected to be in harms way. Maybe some are not the right people for the job.
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Volunteers Too on Dec 14, 2016 at 8:15 pm
June and all,
Firstly, many First Responder's in the Yukon are volunteers. This is not a career choice and we do not receive years of education and training. A few practice hours each month must cover all manner of duties, mandatory learning and growing streams of paperwork to be qualified to serve you safely. However, trauma and stress management is still not part of the standard Yukon program.
Volunteers have to return to work or family the moment that traumatic incident is finished. I cannot write here of the moments and challenges I have had to 'handle' in front of my dear small children. They could not possibly understand why Daddy couldn't hold them after those calls. We don't have paid stress leave and we don't have access to a program of workplace supports or professional debriefing. We have to just carry on. We do our best to take care of each other but sometimes it simply hasn't been enough.
Truly, nobody forces us to do this but we do it because somebody has to. Never send to know for whom the bells tolls, it tolls for thee. There is no lineup to replace us at the doors of our volunteer services. And there is no screening for who can 'handle' it. No matter the training or the apparent mental strength of any individual, these traumatic incidents can be extreme and highly variable and the human responses to each are unpredictable. They are also cumulative. Many incredible personnel serve with great distinction for many years before succumbing to one seemingly innocuous incident.
So sadly, I do acknowledge that much of this is an inevitable side-effect of this necessary service. But unless you are prepared to forego the service these people provide, it is incumbent upon society to do its best to minimize and mitigate the impacts upon their lives, quid pro quo, so they can continue. So we can prevent inevitable critical incident stress from becoming damaging PTSD in the first place. That is what the event and the article were about, recognizing the need and how to better address it. It serves nobody to lose these highly-skilled professionals from their careers or even their lives before their time has come.
This should not be a binary scenario of 'handlers' and 'non-handlers'. We can do better, for all our sakes.
Up 10 Down 1
Charles on Dec 14, 2016 at 5:41 pm
Unfortunately PTSD has a become a buzz phrase for a lot recently, but it is obvious that PTSD could apply to First Responders; not only do they witness horrific situations, but they do it on a regular basis. They are able to act with detachment doing their job at the time, but they are human beings with emotions & reality of what they witnessed goes home with them in their brain. I am not sure I would like to see people in these positions who are so detached and lacking in compassion that they can go without batting an eye. Warning signs of ongoing stress have to be recognized. Good that the need for counseling and time away to re-group and heal is being addressed.
Up 9 Down 22
Stu Winter on Dec 14, 2016 at 2:22 pm
I have PTSD from working with the public.
No one is advocating for me or feeling sorry for me. A few joints and a couple of beer help to hide the clinical signs. Maybe that is the answer.
Up 12 Down 22
June Jackson on Dec 14, 2016 at 12:15 pm
When a person decides on a career choice, enters school, receives education and training I would expect that so called "professional person" would be cognizant of the realities he/she would be facing. EMS career choices surely must come with trauma and stress training?
"If you can’t handle this, you’re in the wrong line of work. "That’s what one of Devin Bailey’s colleagues told Bailey". I don't see anything wrong with this comment...It's applicable to every job on the face of the earth. They even wrote a song about it, "take this job and shove it".
I think that there are valid cases/situations of PTSD, (a man I know killed a man in an accident, and he suffers something terrible, he always sees that person dying in his mind. But he had a desk job and had never seen a violent death before. It was not a career choice for him.)
I also think that PTSD has become the flavor of the month and is becoming the catch all.
Up 32 Down 7
Mr M on Dec 13, 2016 at 4:46 pm
I applaud and congratulate any Emergency worker that can acknowledge or come to terms with the fact they may have or get PTSD and admit it. North of 60 on the other hand has no idea what an Emergency responder has to deal with and the reason they do the work they do. They do the work because they want to help people. That is why I do the job. So North of 60 the next time you need and Ambulance, RCMP, Firefighter or any other Emergency Responder I hope you can look back and the words you said in this article come back to haunt you. Obviously you have a nice safe desk job. I Love My JOB and the people I meet through the work I do.
Up 20 Down 5
PTSD is not endemic on Dec 13, 2016 at 4:40 pm
While I am sympathetic to any worker suffering from PTSD, and awareness is always a good thing, I am concerned with this push to treat all mental illness and emotional distress as "PTSD".
The notion that PTSD is somehow endemic to first-responders is completely false. While first responders may be at higher risk of PTSD due to their higher exposure to the (mainly after-effects) of trauma, being a first-responder does not inevitably lead to PTSD, And, people seem to be confusing true PTSD with a broad range of psychological conditions, that may have nothing to do with their chosen line of work and little to do with trauma.
PTSD can only be diagnosed by a suitably trained and qualified medical practitioner. Importantly, there is NO objective medical test for PTSD - this is a very important point. PTSD can also be notoriously difficult to treat.
Under the guise of faster and better treatment for PTSD (which has not been proven), there is very clearly a push to move the cost of treating mental illness from municipalities and private insurers to WCB coffers.
This will inevitably incease WCB premiums for all other employers as the political deal in the making involves treating PTSD as an occupational disease; hence, costs are transferred from the relevant industry to all employers.
Up 6 Down 8
north_of_60 on Dec 13, 2016 at 12:41 pm
@nick -- and that would be an incorrect assumption about someone you don't know. I've served and done my duty and realized it wasn't a good career choice for me.
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north_of_60 on Dec 13, 2016 at 12:29 pm
Do you always personally attack anyone who doesn't agree with your beliefs?
No doubt such people actually believe they are kind and tolerant, but it's only toward people who think like them.
Discussions like this always show people's true nature, not what they would like us to believe.
Up 36 Down 9
Rosie on Dec 13, 2016 at 12:14 pm
Dear North_of_60,
I think your comments are a clear indication of the stigmas attached to metal health. The kind of dumb comment that offends me as a PTSD survivor. I think you need to really consider what you’re spewing out.
I have PTSD. Individuals that are first responders don’t enter their fields of work asking themselves if they are strong enough. I have seen some of the toughest men I know that have had to respond to tragic accidents, and watch them shake for hours after. There is no lack of objectivity or capacity to do their jobs, nor do they put their colleagues in danger. Quite often, they are saving lives.
As someone who lives with PTSD, I do not put my colleagues in danger. You can be the strongest person, but we all have a breaking point. A professional position as a first responder means that your employer makes sure that the mental health of their employees is a priority.
PTSD is something I would not wish upon anyone. It is a life changer. Just so you know, in a moment of crisis, I am a rock, I am scary objective and rational, but when I get home after a traumatic encounter, not so much. Sometimes it really is hell. Your assumptions are strait up wrong and commenting with assumptions is the reason why the stigma of mental health is an issue that need to be addressed.
Up 35 Down 8
North of 60's comments are idiotic on Dec 12, 2016 at 9:53 pm
North of 60….ever had somebody deal with you or a family member of yours after an accident? Have some respect for the people who serve us. Most of us could not do their job….it doesn't make a person unfit for the job, because they have problems dealing with the trauma they see. Quite opposite--it makes them mentally fit if they can recognize that they have problems and get help and then continue on. No wonder PTSD continues….so much judgement from comments like yours.
Up 40 Down 5
jc on Dec 12, 2016 at 9:51 pm
First Responders suffering from PTSD is real. They are not wimping out or looking for special benefits. I was an Ambulance attendant several years ago. I saw pain and death. It's hard to sleep or concentrate after for some time. PTSD doesn't just refer to soldiers on the battle field. Everyone who witness pain, suffering and death get it. It must be recognized by everyone. And above all, these people need treatment. And North of 60 be glad there are so many people out there that are volunteering for First Responders. They may have to save your life one day. And just a final note, Yukoners can be very proud and thankful for the professionalism of our First Responders in Yukon. I know, I was one of their patients not too long ago. I am very proud of them.
Up 10 Down 45
moose101 on Dec 12, 2016 at 7:06 pm
I cannot understand why a person is doing a job that they mentally can not handle. Do a job that you can and leave these stressful jobs to the many that can . This is not a job you were forced into .
Up 33 Down 2
Doug on Dec 12, 2016 at 6:09 pm
The ignorant thought that it is only the people who cannot disassociate themselves from things are effected... not sure where to start.
Yes if you cannot disassociate yourself from some situations in the moment...that is not a good start.
But indicating that someone who can do their job well but has the one bad call or a build up of smaller ones where it manages to get to them, is low, and ignorant.
It doesn't matter how tough, strong, squared away, or how well someone disassociates themselves from calls. Everyone is susceptible. I challenge you to find one single person who has spent any amount of time responding to calls who hasn't been changed in one way or another. Whether it is evident in their daily life or not. No one leaves the job the same way they came in. It's reality. Just some cope with those changes better in public and some have more extreme effects.
Up 43 Down 7
Ken Putnam on Dec 12, 2016 at 5:39 pm
North of 60, as usual you hide behind your fake name. I have seen many of your posts and most of them are complete babble. However, your post today is the big winner. You simply have no idea what you are talking about.
Up 30 Down 6
Nick on Dec 12, 2016 at 5:37 pm
North of 60, I'm going to make the assumption that with that comment, that you have never served in a first responder capacity ?
Up 26 Down 7
westofbelfast on Dec 12, 2016 at 5:15 pm
North of 60: Could not agree less with you. It is that kind of approach that ends up hurting First Responders rather than help them and providing the support that they need including perhaps, finding other work if being a FR is not your thing. I have done various law enforcement work, been there first to fatalities and other non-fatal situations which can also be pretty hard to take. The problem is that you really can't say if you can handle them until you've tested the water, and for some by that time it is too late. Lots of us can "handle it" and are not a danger to ourselves or others at the scene, but it is the time after the fact that it comes back to haunt you.
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north_of_60 on Dec 12, 2016 at 4:09 pm
"If you can’t handle this, you’re in the wrong line of work."
Exactly true. Nobody is forced to be a first responder. Some people are better than others at disassociating themselves from traumatic situations, being objective, and getting the job done. That's part of the job. If you can't do that, then go get a nice safe desk job, otherwise you're a potential hazard to yourself and your colleagues.
Up 71 Down 5
Samantha on Dec 12, 2016 at 3:52 pm
PTSD is something that should be more widely acknowledged and it is good that there is more light being put on the topic. I have seen nurses, doctors, various caregivers, along with EMS and RCMP go through various forms of PTSD. Being through it myself after an accident, I am much more aware of it and making sure that those around me know that it is ok to talk to someone, and what may happen if they don't address it.